There was a moment during the birth of my first daughter, when my only hope was that both my baby and I survived. Since that point forward, my mothering mantra has pretty much stayed the same. My children have had life threatening experiences and have had emotionally challenging experiences. Every pain they feel, I feel. Every fear they have, I feel as well. My vision of motherhood was not what motherhood turned out to be. What I have found out is that mothering is emotional rollercoaster and it demands great responsibility.
Even though there is responsibility, I enjoy my children and the experience. Like any good experience, the years since my eldest was born have flown by. We have had close moments when I share myself and my hopes, but these moments have been few and far between. I am fortunate to have children, but do not dedicate myself entirely to them. There are bills to pay, job responsibilities, meetings to attend, houses to fix, homes to clean, food to prepare and people to visit. My children need more from me.
Oddly enough, even though mothers are busy, we still find time to blog. Personally, I find writing a method to cope with my overwhelming thoughts and feelings. Blogging is a time to think, analyze and capture thoughts. I can be a better mom once I have had time to think.
My eldest daughter is like me. I worry for her the most, because I know my limitations. I also know that she can do great things because she is creative, sensitive and expressive. She will benefit from guidance and motivation. Like most moms, I want to do a better job helping her. I regret those days when we argue or fight. Years from now, when my children looks back on their childhood, I hope they have fond memories. Some fond memories have been captured on my blog: My youngest reviewing cheese popcorn, My eldest reviewing Grapples, My girls cooking and cleaning. I hope they see my blog and realize that women are capable and can do amazing things.
Happy Mothers Day to my mom, my grandmother and all the hard-working, responsible women out there caring for children. Thank you for all you do.